Jokes txog Armenians: tso dag, tso dag, dab neeg lom zem thiab tso dag zoo tshaj

2024 Tus sau: Leah Sherlock | [email protected]. Kawg hloov kho: 2023-12-17 05:37

Niam lub ntiaj teb muaj ntau haiv neeg thiab haiv neeg ib txwm kam ua ib lub dag zog rau ib leeg. Piv txwv li, thaum nyob rau Amelikas lawv tso dag txog cov neeg Lavxias, hauv tebchaws Russia lawv tsim cov dab neeg txog Asmeskas. Ib qho piv txwv yog tib Zadornov, paub zoo dua rau nws hnub nyoog cov lus: Zoo, cov neeg Asmeskas yog ruam-y-s!.. Qhov tseeb, txhua leej txhua tus nkag siab tias cov neeg Amelikas nyob deb ntawm kev ruam, thiab yog li ntawd tag nrho cov no tau pom tias yog kev tso dag thiab tsis muaj dab tsi ntxiv. Ib qho kev tso dag nrov tshaj plaws hauv peb lub tebchaws yeej ib txwm muaj thiab tej zaum yuav yog lus tso dag txog Armenians, thaum Armenians ib txwm tso dag txog Russians. Dab tsi txaus ntshai tso dag txog lawv tau siv hauv peb lub tebchaws niaj hnub no?

Armenians nyiam dab tsi?

Qhov tseeb, Armenians yog ib lub tebchaws zoo siab txais tos, ua haujlwm hnyav thiab muaj lub tebchaws zoo. Nyob rau hauv Armenia nws ib txwm tshav ntuj, sov thiab nyob txhua qhov chaw, raws li lawv hais ib ncig,Lawv loj hlob txiv qaub, tangerines thiab txiv kab ntxwv. Peb yuav tsis mus rau hauv cov ntsiab lus ntawm seb qhov no yog li cas los yog tsis, qhov tseem ceeb yog hais tias cov Armenians yog ib tug heev phooj ywg thiab zoo siab. Ntxiv mus, kev lom zem txog Armenians yog siv tsis yog nyob rau hauv lwm lub teb chaws, tab sis Armenians lawv tus kheej tsis averse mus ua kev lom zem ntawm lawv cov plaub hau, ntev lub qhov ntswg, resourcefulness, thiab lwm yam. Raws li peb tau pom, tag nrho lawv shortcomings thiab pluses kuj siv tau rau tej yam. lwm haiv neeg. Tab sis nws yog Armenians lawv tus kheej uas nyiam khav lawv.

Qee tus neeg xav txog daim duab ntawm ib tus neeg uas lub ntsej muag ntawm tus "glamorous" no tau muab tso rau hauv kev tso dag zoo txog Armenians.

Tseem muaj yuav luag ntau tus neeg tawm tsam thiab lwm cov duab nrog lub ntsej muag no hauv Is Taws Nem raws li muaj nrog cov npe nrov Zhdun thiab lwm lub tuam txhab.

Armenian tso dag txog Armenians

Ntawm no yog cov lus tso dag txog Armenians, uas tau tsim los ntawm Armenians lawv tus kheej thiab siv hauv Armenia nws tus kheej.

Vim lub qhov rais muaj zog tinting, lub Armenian shuttle, ntawm txoj kev mus rau lub hli, ya dhau lub hli no heev.

Nyob hauv cov tsev kawm ntawv Armenian, cov tub hluas yeej ib txwm rub cov ntxhais lub hwj txwv.

Ib tug Armenian taug kev dhau lub tsev muag khoom npias hauv kegs. Ntawm lub khw nws hais tias: "Lub npias dhau lawm, tab sis rau Armenians nws tag lawm." Ib tug Armenian nug tus neeg muag khoom nrog paj:

- Vim li cas thiaj tag rau Armenians?

- Vim yog vim li cas cov neeg Armenians tsis ntseeg thiab ib txwm nug dua: "Puas tag lawm?"

Nyob hauv Armenia, lub spout ntawm ib lub teapot yog 80% ntawm tag nrhokettle.

Kev ua yeeb yam "Little Red Riding Hood" tab tom ua hauv kev ua yeeb yam hauv Armenia. Nws los txog rau lub sijhawm ntawm kev sib tham ntawm Little Riding Hood thiab hma, thiab nws nug:

- Yawg, ua cas koj lub qhov muag loj li no?

- Thiab saib koj zoo dua…

- Vim li cas koj thiaj muaj pob ntseg loj?

- Thiab hnov koj zoo dua…

- Vim li cas lub qhov ntswg loj?

- Ara, saib koj tus kheej, huh?

Thaum thov ua haujlwm hauv chav haujlwm ua haujlwm, tus poj niam nug tus Armenian:

- Yog, koj tau yuav koj daim ntawv pov thawj los ntawm leej twg?

- Yuav ua li cas yog tus Armenian yuav tam sim ntawd? Tej zaum nws raug ntaus rau kuv?

Lwm tso dag txog Armenians

Tab sis tsis yog Armenians lawv tus kheej tuaj yeem tso dag txog Armenians. Ntawm no yog ib co lus tso dag tsim tom qab cordon.

Moscow, lub sijhawm Soviet. Ib tug Armenian tab tom sim ntes tus neeg ua lag luam se se. Thaum ib tug Moskvich nres ntawm nws tsa tes, nws pib waving, hais, hla, tsis txhob. Ces pov npav. Lub Zhiguli nres, kuj nthwv dej - tsav los ntawm. Lub Volga nres. Tus Armenian nkag mus rau hauv lub tsheb thiab nug tus tsav tsheb:

- Koj lub npe yog dab tsi?

- Vasily…

- Ua ib siab, Vasily. Thaum cov padvises mus rau hauv lub tsev noj mov thiab ib tug hluas nkauj los rau hauv, kuv kuj pom, muab nws txhais tes, thiab koj hais tias: "Tus Thawj Coj, kuv puas yog dawb?" Kuv yuav hais tias: "Yog, koj tuaj yeem so." Koj hais rau kuv tias: "Tus thawj, muab tus saib xyuas rau roj av." Kuv yuav muab ib tug neeg saib xyuas rau koj, yog li ntawd peb yuav them koj li cas?

Vasily nods hauv kev pom zoo thiab coj Armenian mus rau lub tsev so kim. Lawv tsav tsheb. Ib tug poj niam hluas tawm tuaj. Tus Armenian kaw lub qhov rooj tsheb thiab hnia tus poj niam txhais tes. Tus neeg nqa khoom nug:

- Tus Thawj, Kuv puas yog dawb?

- Yes, free, more net for today.

- Tus thawj, muab 500 rub rau kuv, txawm tias hodovka ua yeeb yam…

Tus neeg Armenian saib tus neeg tsav tsheb ntev, ces suav 500 rubles thiab muab nws hla lub qhov rais:

- Vasily, koj yog Maladets, puas yog?..

Thaum caij tsheb ciav hlau, cov neeg hauv tebchaws Russia, Ukraine thiab Armenia pom lawv tus kheej hauv tib qhov chaw. Lub tsheb ciav hlau tsiv, thiab nws yog lub sij hawm los ua kom paub. Cov neeg Lavxias tuav nws txhais tes thiab hais tias:

- Vitaly, Muscovite!

Crest:

- Mykola, Cossack!

Ib tug Armenian kuj tsa nws txhais tes:

- Ashot, BMW!

Thiab lub nkoj caij nkoj mus rau saum roob Ararat, thiab Nau-a pib tso nws cov tsiaj tawm hauv lub nkoj, thiab tam sim ntawd nws pom cov neeg khiav mus rau lub nkoj thiab zoo siab yoj tes qw nrov nrov tias Wai, Ara! Pasmatry! Lub circus tuaj rau peb, yog!”

Muaj tsov rog tshwm sim. Cov Germans ntes nrog Armenian thiab Georgian. Cov Georgian nce ib tsob ntoo, thiab Armenian nkaum hauv hav txwv yeem. Lub Fritz combed lub bushes thiab rub Armenian tawm ntawm lawv. Thaum nws raug coj mus hla ib tsob ntoo uas ib tug neeg Georgian nkaum, tus Armenian tsa nws taub hau thiab qw:

- Katso, nqis, tsis muaj leej twg pom peb ntes tau, puas yog?!

ntse lus dag

Kev lom zem dub hauv kev tso dag txog Armenians kuj muaj ntau. Nov yog ib qho piv txwv ntawm kev tso dag uas ua rau cov neeg Armenians zoo li cov neeg ruam tag:

- Lub tsev so no tsis yog haunted los ntawm lub caij nyoog?

- Yog, muaj ib qho. Hmo ntuj, ib qho ntawmlub zos dab, uas lawv hu ua "Black Guest". Nws muab ib txhais tes rau ntawm koj xub pwg thiab nug…

- "Thov muab kuv lub siab rov qab los?"..

- Tsis yog. Hais tias: "Slushy, Ara, koj puas paub tias kuv nyob hauv chav twg?"

Tab sis Armenians tsis yws txog cov lus tso dag no. Lawv tawm zoo li no:

Cov neeg sawv cev ntawm Qaib Cov Txwv, Lub Tebchaws Yelemees, Armenia, Russia thiab Askiv tau sib sau ua ke hauv ib lub tuam txhab. Tus txiv neej Askiv tshaj tawm ib qho toast: "Rau Askiv lub hwj chim!" Sawv daws haus raws li. Tus Turk sawv: "Rau cov ntaub pua plag Turkish!" Lawv kuj haus. Tom ntej no - German: "Rau German raug!" Great toast. Peb haus. Tom qab ntawd, ib tug Lavxias teb sab sawv: "Russia beauties!" Peb haus dua. Thiab tom qab ntawd ib tug Armenian sawv: "Rau Armenians, uas yog Lavxias teb sab zoo nkauj ntawm cov ntaub pua plag Turkish nrog lub zog lus Askiv thiab German precision …"

xov tooj cua Armenian

Nov yog ntu cais ntawm cov lus tso dag txog Armenians, uas zoo ib yam li kev tso dag txog Stirlitz. Lawv tau siv rov qab rau hauv lub sijhawm Soviet, tab sis qee qhov ntawm lawv tseem muaj feem xyuam rau niaj hnub no, txawm hais tias lawv muaj cov ntawv sau txog kev lom zem dub. Tab sis Armenian xov tooj cua tau tawm ntawm qee cov lus nug tsis yooj yim heev. Nov yog qee cov lus tso dag.

- Nyob zoo tav su, nyob zoo cov neeg mloog. Xov tooj cua Armenian hais lus. Peb xa cov cim lub sijhawm. Thaum pib ntawm lub thib rau lub teeb liab sib raug rau 15:00 Yerevan lub sij hawm: Peak… Peak… Peak… Peak… Peak… Piiik. Nws yog 15:00 hauv Yerevan. Rau cov uas tsis muaj sijhawm, peb rov hais dua: Peak… Peak…

xov tooj cua Armenian nug:

- lo lus "Hlub nyob deb" txhais li cas.

xov tooj cua Armenian xav thiabteb:

- Qhov no yog thaum koj ua haujlwm, pw hauv tsev, thiab haus dej ntawm qhov bar.

xov tooj cua Armenian nug:

- Koj xav li cas yuav tsum tshwm sim hauv lub qhov muag ntawm cov neeg Lavxias kom lawv ntseeg tias kev hloov pauv kom zoo thaum kawg tuaj hauv tebchaws Russia?

xov tooj cua Armenian xav thiab teb:

- Chubais nrog lub saw saw hauv nws txhais tes thiab Nabiulina muag cov noob ntawm qhov chaw nres tsheb…

xov tooj cua Armenian tau nug: "Koj xav li cas yog lub nroog zoo nkauj tshaj plaws hauv ntiaj teb thiab yuav tsum muaj pes tsawg lub foob pob nuclear los so nws lub ntsej muag ntawm lub ntiaj teb?" Raws li xov tooj cua Armenian, tom qab xav, teb tias: "Yerevan yog lub nroog zoo nkauj tshaj plaws hauv ntiaj teb, tab sis Tbilisi zoo dua me ntsis …"

Cov menyuam coaster tsis nkag siab

Hnub no, cov lus tso dag txog Armenian ntawm lub rollercoaster yog nrov heev hauv net. Cov yeeb yaj kiab muaj ntau tshaj li ib lab views, thiab nws yog nrov tsis yog nyob rau hauv Russia, tab sis kuj txawv teb chaws. Nyob rau hauv nws, ib tug txiv neej, zaum ntawm ib tug revolving viav vias, sau tawm ib lub log nyob ib ncig ntawm lub bearing qag, pib quaj thiab thov kom nres lub carousel. Nov yog daim video.

Kuv tsis nkag siab vim li cas txhua tus xav tias nws yog tus menyuam coaster? Peb twv kom paub tseeb rau koj tias qhov no tsis yog qhov kev nyiam txhua. Yog, txawm hais tias nws yog qhov txaus ntshai nyob rau hauv tsos, nws tsis yog ib tug roller coaster tag nrho, tab sis ib hom ntawm ntau lub rooj viav vias. Yog, thiab tsis muaj kev lees paub tias tus neeg hauv daim vis dis aus yog Armenian. Tab sis cov neeg tuaj saib tau txaus siab ntxiv qhov no haiv neeg ntawm Caucasus rau Armenians. Zoo, yog li ntawd. Txawm li cas los xij, cov Armenians yuav tsis ua rau qhov no, nws yog ib puas feem pua. Thiab daim video no funny tiag tiag.

Yuav ua li cas lom zem txog lawvsuav nrog cov Armenians lawv tus kheej

Armenians lawv tus kheej, raws li twb tau hais lawm, yog qhov zoo heev txog kev lom zem hauv lawv txoj kev coj. Lawv lawv tus kheej yog qhov zoo ntawm kev tso dag ntawm lawv tus kheej thiab ntawm tus so, raws li muaj pov thawj los ntawm qhov tseeb tias nws yog Armenian Garik Martirosyan uas yog tus thawj coj ntawm ib qho kev lom zem tshaj plaws hauv peb lub tebchaws - Comedy Club. Tsuas yog tsis txhob muab koj tus ntiv tes tso rau hauv tus neeg lub qhov ncauj, nws yuav muaj peev xwm hais lus rau leej twg, uas tuaj yeem pom ntawm tib qhov ProjectorParisHilton Channel One project. Yog li ntawd, peb xav kom txhua tus neeg Armenians noj qab nyob zoo, lub siab zoo thiab ntau yam lus tso dag, yam uas peb lub neej yuav dhuav thiab tsis kaj siab.